Tuesday, 20 March 2012


Love and hate….something almost everyone has experienced yet, if we say you hate the person you love and you love the person you hate…people will start denying it. I too always thought how can you love and hate a person at the same time? Hmm…a question worth contemplation. But today, during American Literature lecture I become conscious, yes, love and hate go hand in hand. So I draw the conclusion that if you love a person, you hate him and if you hate a person you love him. Let me explain my perceptive.

Love and hate…is a pleasantly annoying dichotomy.  Sigmund Freud said that every lover is a hater. A person, who loves the most, hates the most. And if we relate this theory to our lives I guess every one of us will agree. If you have the capacity to insanely love someone then you also have the capacity to insanely hate someone. Today you love someone and tomorrow if something goes wrong you hate that person. We can say that love is positive hatred and hatred is negative love. Love is a kind of oneness. When you fall in love, you belong to someone thus creating a sense of being one. Hate is when the two wants to push away one another at utmost distance.

If we examine the lives of married couples….everyone thinks that since they are not divorced they are happily married. But is it so? Married couples are not necessarily happy couples though there are exceptional cases. They quarrel a lot, why? Because they love a lot. You might be thinking, quarrel due to love is bullshit….so let me elucidate a bit on this. Love is a dream world and marriage a real world. These two worlds collide with each other when they should happily merge. When you are in love, everything is different. You are treated as if you were queens and kings. Lover can hardly wait to meet his beloved. Lover has many praises and lovely words for the beloved. But then where does all this affections go when you get married? Well, after marriage first thing that replaces your love is a sense of possessiveness though in love also it is there, but the manifestation is not as strong as in marriage. They start quarreling due to the emotion of ownership which gradually leads to repulsion. Secondly, we expect our lover to act according to our taste and we have excess expectations. We become demanding owing to lack of sensibility. We think of our self only. So in marriage lover and beloved get the break to see each other at their best and at their worst.

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.” 
 ____Marilyn Monroe

So guys if u can’t handle someone at their worst  then surely you should never fall in love, least it will only add to the hatred list.

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